"Then
the miracle happened. Oh! a very discreet miracle. I had no cigarette.
As one of my guards was smoking, I asked him, by gesture, showing the
vestige of a smile, if he would give me one. The man first stretched
himself, slowly passed his hand across his brow, raised his eyes, no
longer to my tie but to my face, and, to my great astonishment, he also
attempted a smile. It was like the dawning of the day.
This
miracle did not conclude the tragedy, it removed it altogether, as
light does shadow. There had been no tragedy. This miracle altered
nothing visible. The feeble oil lamp, the table scattered with papers,
the men propped against the wall, the colors, the smell, everything
remained unchanged. Yet everything was transformed in its very
substance. That smile saved me. It was a sign just as final, as obvious
in its future consequences, as unchangeable as the rising of the sun. It
marked the beginning of a new era. Nothing had changed, everything was
changed. The table scattered with papers became alive. The oil lamp
became alive. The walls were alive. The boredom dripping from every
lifeless thing in that cellar grew lighter as if by magic. It seemed
that an invisible stream of blood had started flowing again, connecting
all things in the same body, and restoring to them their significance.
The
men had not moved either, but, though a minute earlier they had seemed
to be farther away from me than an antediluvian species, now they grew
into contemporary life. I had an extraordinary feeling of presence. That
is it: of presence. And I was aware of a connection.
The
boy who had smiled at me, and who, until a few minutes before, had been
nothing but a function, a tool, a kind of monstrous insect, appeared
now rather awkward, almost shy, of a wonderful shyness — that terrorist!
He was no less a brute than any other. But the revelation of the man in
him shed such a light upon his vulnerable side! We men assume haughty
airs, but within the depth of our hearts, we know hesitation, doubt,
grief.
Nothing had yet been said. Yet everything was resolved."
